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 The Gay Dictionary
My best guy friend is straight, open minded, educated and the funniest person I've ever met. I met him after my coming out, so there was never any doubt as to who I am. And he's always been fine with that. I mean, it just gave him more fuel for his incredible sense of humour. He's always funny, but never mean, so it's always been great with him.
Knowing this about him, I suppose that I shouldn't have been surprised on the day that I threw a big party, with a mix of homosexual and straight people, and he showed up with a "Gay Dictionary". He claimed that we gays have a secret language that we use so that straight people don't know what we're saying.
The dictionary was typed and in a binder and left at the buffet table to be used by any straight people who felt that a gay person had left them in the dark.
It was a huge hit! There wasn't a single person there who didn't have a look at it at one time or another, and by the end of the evening, everyone was speaking in stereotypical gay slang.
The words ranged from calling an older gay man an "old goat", "sashaying" by overplaying homosexual gestures, and even making reference to the "one-eyed monk", an amazingly image-ridden term for a penis and a "dangler", which is a rather large one-eyed monk!
I still have the Gay Dictionary, and have even had to photocopy it a few times for friends who just loved it.
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